Watching Jordan Ayew on the pitch is like opening a box of chocolates; you never know if you're getting a masterclass in pressing or a dramatic Shakespearean monologue after a substitution.

If consistency was a currency, Jordan Ayew would be the ultimate philanthropist, constantly spreading his influence across both the stadium grass and the tabloids.

Jordan Ayew has truly mastered the art of making sure the referee, the VAR room, and his own fans are all talking about him simultaneously, regardless of whether the ball actually hit the net.